When God Ran =P

Hee hee. I Love God. It's as simple as that. Wonder what else I can say to express this? ^_^ hee hee (if I made you smile with me, PUT YOUR HANDS UP AND PRAISE HIM! hee hee) *okay, I admit that I DO giggle, stop telling me that I do, already old friends, I KNOW (shy)*

God is awesome. Truly. *Wonder why I didn't relinquish control earlier*. LOL. This life is so much easier to navigate with a GPS (GOD pointing system) ^_^ in us. "The steps of a good (wo)man are ordered by the Lord and He delighted in his (her) way." Psalm 37: 23

I love my job- I mean I love what I do for a living. I love seeing hope sparkle in the eyes of children when they learn that IT IS POSSIBLE for their dreams to come true in this life, no matter what their background or situation. I love seeing Orphange Directors and Superintendents near cry in relief that someone finally is doing SOMETHING to "stand in the gap". I love investors' faces when they realised ALL along they could have made a difference, with just a small administrative step. I love being a connector. =) God, I really thank You for this job. I am truly learning what a Proverbs 31 woman does, and what it takes to live in accordance with Your will.

I wake up everyday going "Good Morning, Holy Spirit! I can't do this without You. I don't want to do this without You! There is no way I am ever going to sort these social issues without Your wisdom. I need Your wisdom cause Your word says to 'get wisdom, for it is the principle thing'. HELP! (LOL!) I am in desperate need of You to guide and order my steps everyday. HELP! I am not qualified to speak to these men and women You send me to. HELP! I need the RIGHT connection!"

Anyone realises that the VERY thing you feel inadequate about and relinquish control to is the VERY thing that God makes you face? Seriously. I never wanted to be in charge of my family, due to what daddy's gone through the last 3 months I had to be. I never wanted to be in charge of my company- now I am in charge of EVERYTHING. (SERIOUSLY, OMG THIS ONE) I never expected that the words of prophecy released into my life on my birthday by one of my papas in the States ARE COMING TRUE NOW! *sheesh*

I talk to "kings" on a daily basis. Owners of businesses, senior vice presidents of banks, presidents of foundations, directors of homes, ministries, etc, etc...all these titles... pfft. I didn't sign up for this "job". Actually, I had no idea what I was signing up for. I thought I was gonna be a nice little operations manager and help with infrastructure. I didn't realise God was waiting to entrust me with MORE. (make appointment with me and I'll share about the crazy things God has had me do lately...lol)

Was talking to a GIG today who said that "It is really difficult being you". (pfft...sorry la, that's why God created you to be you and me to be me. heehee. YOOOO special.. <3) He knows I'm willing to do the crazy stuff for Him in this life. LOL! I know that people have repeatedly told me that I am CRAZY to be able to praise God through this or that or even still "trust Him blindly"... lol. But really dear friends, what else can I do? His presence is what gives me strength to even breathe in this lifetime. I CAN'T HELP praising Him, He is my head troubleshooter, source of all solutions and my chief executive officer. I take orders only from Him. =) I can only admit that I am weak and helpless without Him in my life. ^_^v [delirious much right?]

I can say that I find no "rush" or "pleasure" at the end of the day even from doing my job, surprisingly. Not that I don't love my job, I do. But somethings, like this quiet moment right now where I type my thanksgiving to Him exceeds the thrill of having made a difference in someone's life today. No one can know the near ecstasy of being the center of His attention and to know that you lived for Him today. Yes, I am so completely in love with my Saviour that everything else really doesn't matter. =P

One of the highest peaks of endorphin-rush for me is to know that someone is slowly but surely on their way to meet Him for themselves. A new friend whom the Lord led me to this year is part of a growing crowd of disillusioned christians whom I've been meeting lately. Been listening to them, being a friend and really- telling them "Hey! Your life not as sucky as mine is right now. (lol, true fact) But why are you still angry at God? I'm not. He's the only answer and if you push Him away, who's gonna help you?" hahahaha. that usually gets the point across. But really, listening to the Holy Spirit's instructions, as simple as "follow up with him" or "send him this song, I am speaking to him now" or "she needs to hear your stories" or "just sit and listen to her" has seen tremendous changes in the lives of those whom I'm called to serve.

I will never forget my place on this earth. It is to serve. Whether it be friends, family, community, my boss, or even my future husband...it is to serve. Cause I am only following the example of the greatest servant leader of all. A King is called to serve, remember that- every King has a set of standards in the bible that if they don't follow, they will get severely whacked for by God (one of them is oppressing the poor and needy). A prophet is called to serve "to edify and build up the body of christ", a pastor is called to serve "sheep that bite" lol! A teacher is taught by his students, an evangelist ministers to the needs of the lost. All these no matter priest or King, are called to serve, and to serve the Most High God. The Aslan of Judah. =)

I was so encouraged to get feedback from seeing a song I sent to a friend who is seeking the Lord, being posted on his wall- a facebook message response about this blog (GIG! YOU PAISEH FOR WHAT!?! lol. Your message spurs me on towards knowing Him more! and yes, I heard the song before. very good. ^_^) and simple things like a whatsapp message stating "you've made a difference in my life for being real even in your struggles" or "I was thinking of you and your dad..." or "Esther- you're a Jesus Freak do you know that? I LIKE!" LOL!!!! okies. I can accept that. <3

I wanted to say that one of the most powerful concepts in this life is knowing that you are loved and will always be given access to the throne of grace as long as you RUN TO HIM! It is powerful to understand what Jesus said- "No one can come to me, unless the Father who sent me draws him , and I will raise him up in the last day." John 6:44

Guess WHO was running to you and DRAWING you to Him before you even came to know of the Lord Jesus Christ? The Father! someone holla *WHOA!* He was pursuing you long before you even came to know of the saving grace of Jesus Christ. "Not by might, not by power, but by my Spirit" says the Lord. =)

Be blessed this week dearies! <3

"Finding freedom is not letting your yesterdays affect you today." -Joyce Meyer



/edit: happened to meet one of my fellow LTB head TAs who is serving out his six year bond with the SAF yesterday at a gathering. He's super funny la. I asked him what changed when he saw his life flash before his eyes while on his 6 month stint to afghanistan.

Answer: "You learn that everything you can possibly give away to anyone you ever loved is summarised on ONE SHEET of paper; and that you really truly love only a few people-cause they are who you remember. You learn that in combat, the most important thing in a war is to- SURVIVE. And when nothing bad is happening around you, SOMETHING IS WRONG. You're being lulled to a false sense of security."

Very wise, CJZ, very wise. =)

hahaha.