HAPPY BIRTHDAY AH PA!!! lol. TJIA YEN HAO-YOU'RE OFFICIALLY THE OLDEST! happy? lol. *红包!*

hi all. just to inform all the people who read this: I have a prob with my handphone-so I can't call or send smses but I can receive whatever you send me/ phone calls. SO PLEASE DO THAT!!! haha.. dun be like daph, who knew this piece of info and proceeded to send me a one liner sms that I couldn't reply... LOL. *lub* and yes, the good news-mel's not leaving YET. ^^ hee. ohohoh... and cara called me last night. ^^ hee. yays! so exciting! I love surprise phone calls... like the one daph gave me (three attempts, I know) and penny... hee. okok. back to being all motivated to do work. am a busy woman! hahaha..

oh btw-kats and kris (my cookie monster and garfield) I love you two so much. thanks for having the goodbye breakfast with me. I'll miss you both and my regular hugs and kisses. :( But Ghim Moh market breakfast [kat: I'll eat up half the food in the hawker centre! *one plate of noodles later* I'm full!] was so much fun! we have to do it when you get back with sarina and mich and jeri and...just for fun! LOL. God Bless ya'll! 晚安哦！哈哈！花样少年少女rocks! OH and I'm sooooo happy! I just found out that ELLA from SHE ( lead actress from 花样少年少女) is a christian! wow! I'm really really happy! and the programme where she said it is on youtube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6rvuSo9lMBc Very touching and it was all because of a teacher who showed her the way while she was in school.　哇 好感动哦！感谢耶稣！I'm super overjoyed! okok...lol. nites!

to kathi and kristi:

I'LL MISS YOU TWO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH! (because i'm not mentally prepared) to let you go. I'll never ever forget the (close to 3) years we spent together. laughing, screaming at each other, crying, dancing, hugging... omg. I can't let you guys go yet. not yet!!! I'm like crying now. what the heck? I listened to "walking on sunshine" and cried ok? that's how much I'm going to miss you people. my huggables and emo partner. :(((( ACS International was special because of you two. (kristi don't say "i know right"...I'll knock you on your head. lol) omg. omg. leaving me to go to australia? you better come and look me up everytime you come back. my heart wun be able to take it if you ppl leave just like that. :((( friends forever-mr blur my sotong will accompany me til you guys come back. lol. omg. God Bless cookie monster and garfield.

to mel: (who is also leaving me for australia this week)

I'm going to miss you soooooo much too. outta all the pix we took, this is my fave-where we didn't have perfect hair, perfect skin, perfect lighting-but we had perfect fun. omg. we did lose out in the times when we didn't sort things out. "Home" will always be a special song for me, I hope for you too. thank you thank you for everything-truly from all the pep talks, to random song singing, to "makeovers" LOL, to opening up your home to me. Thank you for these 2 wonderful wonderful years. Most importantly for believing in me-I could not have asked more from a "best friend". I hope this friendship we have now will remain. I will keep you in my prayers always sister. please never forget the common things we share-GCM's lessons being one of them... hahaha. I'll miss you mel. Another classmate lost to other countries. bah. I can't help but cry la-losing too many people at one shot. and I'm listening to emo songs now-so not helping. lol. sorry for not clearing it up earlier-we could've done more. ack. I'll never forget you please don't forget me too. (ok cheesy...but true) God Bless you always.

ok. so if anyone else is leaving within this 2 weeks, please don't tell me. thanks. my heart (and tear ducts) can't take anymore news like this. :( anyway, goodnight peeps. I really love you guys and girls. no matter how small a role you think you've played in my life-I'll remember. just ask my sis-I have a VERY GOOD memory of people and memories. really. *mwah and hugs*

hey all. just been informed today that one of my cousins has "happenstanced" upon my blog. LOL. I posted a bday message for you sometime back, by the way. And I talk about you guys all the time. Must be important eh? hahaha.

Anyway, been back to school to get my A level cert yesterday. Met ANGELA!!!! penny and nat dang for dinner at Food Junction last night. bumped into kathi and kristi there too. ^^ then took a bus home with sis.

today: went to office to clear some stuff, went to far east to buy pumps (OUT OF STOCK :S) met mel and iain for lunch at Thai Express. *peace* lol. Jiraporn (orange) is leaving for HAWAII via KOREA tonight. blessed girl! hahahaha. went back for CF-sean, mr poh and I then went through the plans for REW and maundy thursday service. Lookout for what we'll be up to in the coming weeks! TRUTHMIN WILL BE AROUND ON MAUNDY THURSDAY!!!

woot! am trying to upload 专属天使 by tank (middle with ella on left and wu chun on right) with English subs onto this page so the people who have been bugging me about it and asking for translation can just see it here. LOL. managed to tinkle the ivories and figured out his lead vocals on the right hand. ^_^

yay! so anyway, I've been happy lately for no particular reason other than the fact that I like being happy. hee. laughed myself silly watching 娱乐百分百 and 完全娱乐 with sis and family-including maid...hahaha... who is currently smitten with Daniel Henney and just as excited about a Goong sequel as I am. haha. I love my family! haha... other dedications will have to wait. am busy with another project. Until then- watch hana kimi 花样少年少女 and Goong 宫 if you're like me-can't stand to cry too much but loves the romantic comedy storyline. hahaha. so in all the languages I know... good night! 晚安！anhyosayo! selamat malam! sayonara! kia ora! shalom! hahaha. (working on it...) God Bless peeps, bros and sis!

哈哈 Ella from S.H.E is really a good actress and she's such a funny person. watched a couple of her BTS (behind the scenes) stuff and she's very very kua zang. 她真得是很好笑。 ^_^ am about to post a very sentimental post for friends [好朋友们] especially to my sistas。 ( in no particular order ok? *mumbles, dun ask me why your name is not at the top or in whatever order you prefer... LOL* 不是故意的！哈哈)

to penny: sorry didn't get the chance to hang with you today and especially during the hols. I miss you alot. thank you for always being there whenever I need a "shoulder to cry on". you constantly are somehow connected to me-and I'm so glad God put you into my life. you are someone who knows just when I need to hear certain things, brutal or not and you have a way of sending me messages in my hour of need just to encourage me. Please know that what you've said to me about the one person lost is true for you too. you're the only person crazy enough in school to actually not think i'm crazily quiet when I'm "far away" or crazy when I'm giggly and high. :))) thank you for inundating me with sushi tei and for all your highness and lows and random singing. If you're quack, you're mine k? remember that? lol. ^^ muack! you truly are the best definition of a "best friend" that any girl can have. I promise you we'll get round to our girl day in.. lol.

drish: I miss you so terribly. I'm soooo glad that you messaged me. We all have a pact remember? Waugh, Nagle and Goudie [CORNELL, PURDUE, SMU] You can bet I'll be at the airport with the words "welcome BEACK drishti!" LUB you to bits. miss you much.

nat: OMG OMG when I saw you on v-day cause of the chilli plant, I was soooo happy to see you. my gosh. never missed you more than when you aren't around. LOL. okok.. not the point...BUT... thanks nat. I know I haven't gotten around to remember to say thanks for everything but thanks. [you know. ] during the "july days" I felt so loved and accepted by drish and you. thank you for always trying to make things easier. you truly are a blessing. and it is such an honour that God has brought you into my life.

kong lam: (still) in love with you FOREVER k? see? see? BIG word! lol. omg lam. God put us back together after losing contact in pri school. it's a wonder and an amazement at what he's done. thank you for your blunt words that have woken me up plenty of times. thanks for always trying to make every woman sexay. LOL. 我好喜欢你苗条的身材喔！哈哈！我对神有很大的感谢，这是因为他把你靠近我身边。(ahhh.. forgive language errors-up till now still working on it.) but you get it la. miss you lots lam. you made my eyes red for a long time at your departure you know!?! you know how much beauty sleep was needed after that?

daphne: miss you lots and lots. I know your circumstances are not helping, but keep strong. don't be afraid to let someone know and pray with you about them k? I love you so so so much. without you I wouldn't have had such happy bio days..well sorta, the stress was fun! LOL. dearest dearest bio buddy- you rock! know that there will always be people who can see the gem that you are and tell you that. YOU ARE LOVED AND ACCEPTED by the ONE who created you. and HE never fails. ^^

lydia: 哈哈！妹妹！我好爱你哦！只有你能够在家里跟我一起笑着，哭着，大喊大叫。我心里的深事你都知道，什么秘密也都会猜出来。好厉害！and you're not upset by my crazy phases. lol. I am NOT talking about the current one. hahahaha. aiya, so many things to say to you. like, thanks for getting me off my lazy bum and making me walk, grocery shop, go to town, etc... the gentle push you provide is always more than enough for me to know that I'm heading in the wrong direction. please do well for your As and prove to everyone that what I've told them that you're "much smarter than me" and “非常非常聪明”是真的。^_^

cara: I'm so glad you're a 5 minute walk away. you're like an instant cheerer-upper and source of extra clothes...hahahaha... it's true! if cara's dress has a "boob problem" it's next likely target is me. hahahaha. I love you lots cara yong! my "boyfriend" and walking home buddy. I can't believe we spent so much time talking as we walked. my gosh, no wonder we burned those calories! hahaha. CARA AT ZARA!!! thank you for everything you've done for me. truly truly grateful and thankful for you. :))) hee. pool crasher!!! incoming! hahaha.

yessie: sista! I miss you sooooooo much. I'm so glad I decided to talk to you on your first day in school. it's given me your most valuable friendship. lol. I love you truly. ^^ hee hee. ANT!!! LOL. can imagine your face. your *diao* apa? face. hahaha. love you very very much. we need to go out to just talk (NO EATING!!! hahaha) and shop and stuff. hope you graduate with flying colours!!! GAMBATE sista!!!!! ^^

shu hui: shwee! lol. you ah... so active one. SUPER SKINNY! my motivation ok? hahaha. thank you for all your kind words, thoughts and actions. you've been such a good 阿妈! hahaha. I will never forget how capable you are... sergeant in NPCC ok? hahaha. miss you.

yen hao: oei tjia tjia liang teh! lol. T squared lives! hahaha. thank you soo much-this 阿爸！hahaha. owe us 红包钱! lol. working as a pretty well dressed waiter huh? lol. ok la! accountant! miss you so much as well. :))))

jon: hey bro. so glad you're a mature one in christ. I can hold all my discussions with you and you're fully capable of answering any questions and still pose serious comments. thank you for all your years of friendship. SIX YEARS!!! and the good times we've always had. I'm truly grateful for the way God placed us in each other's lives. :))) til next meeting. (quick, plan of torture for yessie!!! hahaha)

gavin: tong chai!!!! never fails to cheer me up!!! komowo! sahranghantagul-you are truly a blessing to me and my sister. bro, know that if you have issues of the heart, you can always tell me honestly k? I'll be right here for you, just as you were right there for me when I was down. hahaha. mad basketball skills! I miss you so much (teach me how to say this in korean!!) hahaha. God Bless you dearly.

sean: DIVA!!! I know you've been going through a hard time. and your heart is troubled by certain issues. but do not grow weary for "they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not grow faint" and when you wait upon the Lord, He will renew your strength and you will soar with wings as eagles. I love you so so so so so much my brother. truly. for such spiritual maturity at your age, you're really a gem and a blessing to many others. count this school as a part of the ministry that God is using you for. and then count the blessings you've received. God has a plan for you. ORU!!! hahaha.

evan: EVAN!!! always smiling and warm, and welcoming and also such a mature person in Christ. OEI! can you not be so cheem? LOL. but I love you for that! thanks for all your love, support and encouragement. I'm so proud of you and the person God created you to be. you're such an unassuming, hardworking, loving person. I thank God He brought you into my life. YOUR HUGS ARE ONE OF THE BEST!!! love!!! :))))))))

kathi: KATS!! my emo partner! but also my bouncy bouncy ball! hee hee. I love you and miss you. and you're special to me cause of OMNIKRON!!! hahaha. we go WAAAY back eh? these years have taught us much. I love you so much. *Do you realise we actually talk like a heck of a lot in school especially in 2005?* hahaha. COOKIE MONSTER!!!

kristi: HUGGABLES!! MY measuring tape! hahaha. I love you sooo much kristi. thank you for the love, laughter and bright sunshine that you brought into my life. we spent so many hours in the canteen talking-it's unbelieveable. I miss that. I was so happy to see you and GARFIELD! lol. don't forget me. cause I wun forget you. besides, who can forget your singing eh? LOL. love you lots my dear!

miles: *thng thng thng thng* hahahahha. I still can't believe you thought I was calling you! ^^ but hey, you're irresistable eh? you are such an incredible blessing-when I was down but never told you guys, you said all the right words of encouragement at the right time. thank you for that. I am sooooo thankful that God put you in my life too. I love you miles THNG!!! ^^

luigi: art green thou favouritest colour? LOL. army right? luigi I am SO GLAD I KNOW YOU! you're always laughing and smiling and full of life! VIVA LUIGI!!! hahaha. I mean, you rock the socks off everyone! haha. were you flash?(orientation camp 2004) hahahaha. yea-we ruled as seniors eh? I miss GMSS days. we NEED to hang more. love, joy, peace! hahaha.

TCC: CANDLESTICKS!!!! ^^ hee. so bright yea? hahahaha... omg.. lameness and corn soup abounds. eh, you suck leh. only treat chua. but SURPRISINGLY for a guy guy-you listen quite well to problems ah? lol. if prefects hadn't thrown us together right... I would still have called you 90 degrees perpendicular! hahaha. and whatever la, you can call me whatever you so decide to. hahaha. eh, invite me to your wedding ah... VERY IMPORTANT thing to remember. I want to meet your bride and tell her of all the times you complained about life partners. LOL. thank you for listening, helping, making fun of me-it made me think harder, encouraged me (in your special TCC way) hahaha...(ros would laugh at this) remember. we can always find jobs us telemarketers if any plans fail. ROFL. love, peace and "god bless everyone". hee.

sarina: omg. first every friend in ACS INTL. neighbour, sister, haato buddy, bus buddy, essential brew buddy, OMNIKRONIAN, choir mate, school mate, OGL. you were the bestest best closest younger sister in school ever. I remember my tears you wiped and I wiped yours. and all our random fears we would console. thank you dearest. you mean the world to me. ^_^

mich: wah! mich! STORY AH? goong fans... look dao together, but actually full of nonsense... hahaha. I'm so glad that we reunited. I remember crying at orientation camp when you left. cause I was so upset that it would be the last time I might see you. you really are something special. HAHA!!! yea yea I know, mich is the ONLY one to pick my bf out. thanks ah? lol. must ask for your approval somemore. haha. I love you so much. God Bless!

andrea: drea! we need to bump! I mean at HOLLAND V! all the best for your As! may you get flying colours. we MUST MEET! love you!

sam: hee. busy ah? sam, you know that for someone as petite as you are, you really look after everyone you view as a friend. like you really nag and mother us. LOL. my CLB buddy! super super funny! I loved lessons because of you. thanks for everything, from brigade in pri 5 through to sec sch-you were always there for me. love!

shaz: EH!!! GEOG BUDDY!!! with the killer voice. (and looks) hahaha. we're one of a kind weird I tell you. we can just pick off where we left off and talk like we've been doing it all the time. haha. I miss Ghim Moh times with you. you and your "that CHEW LA!" hahaha...and miss chin's lessons would have become a taaaad boring without you disturbing OSH and Chun with me. hahaha. and that Tjahyadi...hee. think he may have had a major thing for you. so fun! thank you for all the fun! love you so much.

jeri: essential brew ain't the same without you. that says a lot AND sums it up. I love you loads.

rach: haato buddy and chapel buddy. I miss you. I'll come back to see you whenever I'm free k? I love you so much. I'll be praying for you. God Bless.

See? See? I told you I was sentimental and ranting a bit ah... lol. if your name is not here, it'll be in another post quite shortly. LOL. I'm quite tired now. God Bless you all! (as kenneth says) hee. 祖你们生活快乐哦！晚安！

哇！没想到我看华语节目能够帮我经部！哈哈我现在讲的华语比已前的有好大的进步哦! 我真得很高兴！看来，红老师也会替我很开心的！都是为了那个“花样少年少女”(hana kimi)。:) 哈哈节目上的一首歌 Tank 唱的 “专属天使”(my personal angel) 真好听呢！ 还有另外一个“一直都在”(always been there) 也是很好听！然后因为字传给我的感受也很真却，我就爱上了这两首歌！好朋友们， 你们一定要去听那两首歌呀!

haha. hey guys and girls. so weird huh? esther's typing in chinese. lol. forgive my language errors, i'm still trying to improve. but at least now I can speak with a certain level of fluency. ^^ 陈淑玲 (angela) called me up on tuesday night and we had an entire conversation in chinese! yay! 但是她这个女孩阿，把她心里的秘密都说的出来了! 哈哈！宝贝阿我很爱你！^^ It's really strange that when I'm not all stressed out about something, example-华语(chinese), that I learn and absorb really fast! hehe. so fun! okok. I think it's super cool how I've learnt to improve my language from a TV drama and picked up korean too! hee. kk. just blogging cause this has made me happy. lol. DAPHNE!!! you missed the camp! it was great. God Bless. I'll update again soon. need time to rest now...*used up energy during the camp* oh! and 我要去看妈妈买的“花样少年少女”DVD!!! heee... goodnight!

^_^ esther's in love!!!! hee. <3

k, that's about it. haha. have left clues everywhere for my dearest penny to guess... hee. oh! learning to sing in chinese more fluently. ^^ actually have motivation to do stuff more effectively. been watching hana kimi-very very very funny show. I love how Ella (the E from S.H.E) has such kua zang expressions. been laughing. :) which is good.

Aaron has been commissioned. hahaha. poor ivan-now he has to siam him. that's quite funny. "eh cadet, see the tree on that hill top? it's calling your name..." ^_^ went to Heeren yesterday before church with sis. :))))) hee hee. ohohoh! I bought a pink pageboy cap!!! LOL. so unlike me, but it makes me feel happy. haha. I bought something I liked with money I earned. hee. that's a good feeling. erm... bumped into shunyi and nikki in HMV too. :)))) k!!! done. night!!! hee.* 我只對你有感覺* (wo zhi dui ni you gan jue)

[translated-I only have feelings for you] my happy song! lol. God bless peeps!! <3

just went to a funeral last night. the lady who passed away was a close family friend (who lived near kathi and kristi-so we went to say hi on the way) she battled with Alzeimer's disease for over 20 years. I cried-naturally. but you have to know her. the doctors wanted to pull the plug on her very early on when she started not being able to speak, move or feed herself. but she soldiered on. she made it known that she was still very much alive. when the nerves in her hands were still functioning, she'd grab my hands even when she couldn't speak, just to acknowledge me. then, she'd make sounds in answer to our questions and would blink her eyes more when we spoke to her. when she was flat out on her back, she would respond to our entrance into her room with excitement-her heartbeat went up. :) I also got a chance to pray with her (by myself) last year and while I was praying with her about life and overcoming hardships, she cried. Tears fell from her eyes and her heartbeat went up even though she could not respond aurally or physically anymore. she was ALIVE. this is one of the reasons why I would never champion euthanasia. there is more to a person than just motor functions-she had a LIFE beyond what you could imagine, touching so many people, and when she finally passed away, she looked so peaceful.

I also bring you the story of a man- her husband.

back in 1993 (he's 90 years old now) when he had a bypass surgery, she was afraid to lose him and told him to never leave her. he promised her that he'll look after her til she drew her last breath. so when she was at the hospital and the doctors said she was dying, he asked her if she wanted to come home and she responded by blinking. so when she got home, he asked her to open her eyes and look around- which she did. then he told her, while crying, that it was okay to go home. so half an hour later with all her family members surrounding her, she passed away peacefully. he told us this story last night at the funeral service and when he cried, my heart couldn't take it. but I really salute them. they shared a love that was beyond what some of us would even do. to stay beside a person who can no longer respond physically, reading the bible to her and talking to her day and night, is such a grand feat and one truly done out of the love in his heart.

I just had to share this love story (like out of the movies huh?) which was so real and such a blessing. something every relationship should have-selflessness. and yes, my eyes are red from all the crying. haha. God Bless.

one of them smart people, also known as one of my cousins, said that this is the true definition and classification of sanity and insanity. (refer to below)

SANITY (normalcy)

INSANITY (odd 1%)

THE ARMY (vast majority of males under 23 years of age)

by the way, the genius who said this is the guy in the pic below:

Leslie Lim- the cousin who ain't a Tan but cherished nonetheless. LOL.

This is what triggered the random post. Chap Gor Meh. (15th day of chinese new year-and the end of it) everyone came over to our house today for lunch [dinner was out-army book back in] hahaha. btw, their definition of "happy hour" is when they hear "book out" lol. I really love and miss my cousins oh so much. It's always been an awkward thing among us until finally we sorta sorted it out at this age (where we're all comfortable interacting with each other)... and then NATIONAL SERVICE separates us for the weekdays. :( but nonetheless, I am happy to see/ hear (from) you guys! ^^

met penny (with lyd) at holland village just now to watch her get her hair bobbed. LOL. pretty la, pretty! hee. caught "ugly betty" on TV. It's like the devil wears prada, except the protangonist would probably end up with the head of the office- which would be weird in the case of the devil wears prada.. haha. chatting with mich and gavin. love you two! hey tong chai! we need to meet up! sarina!!! lunch!!! lol. cya all soon, am uber busy this week. call me if anything! God Bless!